Pick-a-City

Vacation…over.  So the first thing everyone asked me when I was home was, “So, how do you like it up there?”  I mean, it was practically a given.  My answer?  “I like it, it’s different.”  This, of course, is a crappy answer, which just leads to more questions.  And really, all people want to know is “Which city do you like better?”  Be honest, you’re dying to know.  So without actually answering the question, I present to you 10 reasons to LOVE each city.  I thought about doing a hate list, but I’m in a good mood…

OKC
#1	$5.50 movies, $7.00 24-packs.
#2	The sun.  You can see it…
#3	The stars.  You can see them…
#4	Non-public transportation.
#5	Grocery stores with HUMONGEOUS aisles.
#6	Al, Jim, and the Animals.
#7	Sonics, Braum’s, and ice cream on every corner.
#8	Emily Elliott.  If you don’t know her, you’re missing out.
#9	Air conditioning.
#10	Ability to wear sweats out in public and still fit in.

NYC
#1	$1.00 Nuts-4-Nuts, $5.00 gallon of fresh honey.
#2	Central Park.
#3	Broadway shows.
#4	Public transportation.
#5	Farmer’s Markets with hot apple cider.
#6	Radio City Christmas Spectacular.
#7	Zabars, Carnegie, and deli’s on every corner.
#8	Scarlett Johansson on Broadway.
#9	Snow.  The enjoyable kind.
#10	You can pretty much wear anything you want.

Recycling

No one likes recycling. If you do, there is something terribly wrong with you. I would compare recycling to snow. You think it is going to be cool all year. "Wow, snow!" And when it starts snowing for the first time every year, it's great. Then you're snowed in, the electricity goes out, you're feet are frozen solid from the slush you're walking through, and your girlfriend hates you for no reason other than it's cold outside. Same with recycling. "Wow, save the planet." Then you're sorting into 20 trash cans, carrying trash to other trash cans 5 times a day, dodging cockroaches in the basement, and clogging up space in your apartment with 2 liter bottles.

    Of course, recycling happens to be the law here in greater NYC. Given my Christian background, I feel compelled to follow the letter of the law. However, I hate recycling. So the question really becomes, "How can I avoid both recycling AND feeling guilty for not doing so?" Well my friends, I have found the answer!

    Step 1: Get one trash can and only one trash can. This makes the whole recycling process more difficult, leading to you being more bitter (apparently it's "bitterer" but how dumb is that?) about recycling, which leads to less guilt for not doing it.

    Step 2: Throw all trash that CAN be recycled into the trash can.

    Step 3: Cook yourself dinner. Be sure to cook way too much of something that just can't be used for leftovers.

    Step 4: Dump the leftover food on top of the recyclable goods.

    PRESTO! New York City can't possibly be upset that you didn't dig through your leftover chili just so you could recycle one stupid Diet DP can?! Of course not! Guilt eliminated.

First Rule of Moving

I've just moved from OKC to NYC this week. There is almost too much to write about all of the things I've learned in just the first week, but here is probably the most important. If you are moving anywhere (not just small town to big city), find yourself a COMFORT FOOD.

Mine's chocolate. And its a good one to have because anywhere you move they have chocolate. If they don't have chocolate just give up because you're not going to be happy there!

Once you've figured that out, go out and buy a crap load. Like enough to where if you have to lock yourself up and not leave for three days, you still won't run out of whatever it is. And then you're game. The first thing I did when I was by myself here in NYC was eat about 50 pieces of Hershey's Nuggets (not my favorite, but sometimes you have to just get through the day...). That calmed me down enough to go back outside and walk the town and I've been eating a little less each day.

More advice to come!